


This is the way I pray

by tintentod



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe, Bottom!Bucky, M/M, Smut, Soldier!Steve, dystopian universe, love making in a confessional, maybe he can be considered as power bottom, preacher!Bucky, talk about new demoniations
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-08
Updated: 2016-11-08
Packaged: 2018-08-29 18:57:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,675
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8501488
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tintentod/pseuds/tintentod
Summary: In a dystopian future, in which Steve thinks he has lost his best pal in a war that finally brought world peace, he returns back home and learns to pray again.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I know, don't look at me. Instead of writing something new, I should be working on my WiP. But please blame [Slaughter_Me](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Slaughter_Me/pseuds/Slaughter_Me) who is a magician with Photoshop and does amazing manips. She showed me one she's currently working on and I was inspired, so I fell and this happened. A huge thank you for listening to me ranting and complaining and checking my stuff goes out to [blessyourdoubts](http://archiveofourown.org/users/blessyourdoubts) who was amazing as always. Hope you guys enjoy.

War is never good and never satisfying. War wrecks and leaves everything in ruins. This war, though, was different because the end result was beautiful. Weapons had been destroyed, peace treaties signed and Steve traveled around the globe to help. He’d fought in this battle, had seen the destruction wrecking the cities and how everything fell apart. Now, ten years later, mother nature took care of the damage control. There was more green than he ever imagined he would see in his lifetime. The only thing missing was Bucky. Who always had his back, who was so much more than a friend and who never knew. 

 

Steve wanted to curse himself for never telling him, always too afraid what it would cost them. And when he went down, everyone dragging him away from his lifeless body, he went with them. They were running for their lives and when they stopped, Steve wished he’d stayed. As beautiful as this world was about to become, not having Bucky by his side would always be his greatest regret. It was one of the reasons why he never stayed long in one of the newly formed countries and why New America was the last one on his list. When the hovercraft landed in what used to be Brooklyn and Steve got out of the car, he was thrown for a trip. None of the buildings he’d known greeted him, the ruins covered by ivy and wisteria and the pavement had made way for grass and wild flowers. This was a dystopian future no one had seen coming and everyone welcomed with open arms, embracing one another with so much love and honesty, there’d been more than one occasion in which Steve couldn’t hold the tears back. Not so much because he finally saw people coming together, but because he was missing the person he wanted to share this with. Everyone was glowing with so much love, some of it directed at him when he helped building new schools and new hospitals, it was hard for him to handle it at times. 

 

And now being back in his birthplace, he felt it even more. There was a craving deep in his bones, one he lived with for a very long time and could never quite shake. One that called out to one person especially. Walking down streets they had stepped on together only intensified this feeling to the point Steve had to stop, sitting down in one of the overgrown ruins on a bench. It took him a bit until he realized where exactly he was, only barely recognizing the old church his mom had taken him to when he was a kid. The roof was gone, only the wall behind the altar still reached up to the sky while the impressive colored glass windows were now empty. There were only a couple of pews still intact and mostly covered with moss and more ivy, still everything seemed well groomed and upon a closer look Steve noticed this place was still in use. He knew new denominations had been founded and one in particular had caught his interest, one without a name and more open and liberal than any other denomination before. Steve had come across people who were living after their ideal, celebrating love and Mother Earth and their bodies and minds. It was beautiful seeing all kinds of humans coming together. Some of them barely dressed others still being hesitant to show their bodies, kissing and touching in front of the preacher who, himself was not wearing much. Just some dark shorts and a meshed shirt, heavy boots on his feet, telling stories about the beauty of nature. More than once had Steve caught himself sitting down with them, listening in on the mesmerizing tales and wondered where this kind of love and dedication had been before the bombs fell. 

 

But he knew he shouldn’t dwell on the past, as hard as it was and the only thing he still missed was the one he couldn’t have. He didn’t miss all the fashion advice and clothing stores or the luxury shops; he was happy with what he was carrying in his little bag and what he wore on his body. And that was how everyone was living their lives these days. The beginning was hard, starting to build on what had been destroyed, but the more time passed the happier the people became. Everyone still moaned the loss of a loved one, but they were holding their memory in their heart and while it was fine for everyone else, Steve occasionally still felt as if he was cursed. 

 

He was tired and he noticed he had been sitting on the pew far too long when he heard a soft murmur and then the creaking of wood. Turning his head around, he found there was a confessional. It surprised him to find someone stepping out of the booth, but he guessed not everything had died with the last war. 

 

For the longest moment he contemplated if this would help him, easing his conscience and maybe asking for forgiveness. Before he could change his mind, he grabbed his bag and walked over through the grass and stepped inside. At first he thought he was alone and that the person before him had just needed a moment to himself, but then there was a sound on the other side and a soft voice asking, “What is it I can help you with?”

 

Maybe it was the acoustic in the box, but for one blissful moment Steve’s mind was filled with Bucky’s face and he felt the emotions already overwhelming him again. And maybe this was the reason why he heard himself say, “I want to ask for forgiveness.”

 

“What for?”

 

“I should be grateful I’m alive; I should be happy for the people around me being loved and loving in return; I should be proud of the work I’ve done in the past years. Yet, here I am and I feel nothing except a big, black hole that is slowly eating me alive and I don’t know what to do about it.”

 

There was another creaking sound from the other side and Steve wondered if he was saying too much, if his words were too raw for someone else to hear. What if he was saying something he wasn’t allowed to? 

 

“What do you think it is you’re missing?” the voice wanted to know and Steve huffed a bitter laugh.

 

“Something that died ten years ago. I...I didn’t want to come back to New America or Brooklyn, but when it was getting closer to the tenth anniversary of his death and I found myself boarding the hovercraft…” Steve stopped himself and looked down at his worn down military boots, his dusty black pants starting to fall apart, and he wondered what he could have offered anyway.

 

“You’re mourning someone’s death?”

 

“And envy everyone who can love the person who is dear to them.”

 

“Don’t let these dark feelings consume you. Would your friend have wanted you to feel this way?”

 

There was another laugh, but far easier and Steve found it was genuine. “He would’ve told me I’m a punk. And probably that I should take some girl dancing. As always. Dancing was his solution for everything.”

 

Maybe Steve was imagining it, but there was something like a shift in the atmosphere and he was surprised when he heard movement on the other side and a second later a figure stood in front of him. The sun made it hard to look at the man’s face, so all Steve saw at first were strong legs in boots, his middle covered with a pleated skirt that hung low on narrow hips and the right arm covered in a leather sleeve that was fastened around his neck. But what caught his attention the most was not the lack of clothes, but the left arm. The metal arm.

 

“Bucky?”

 

Strong arms reached for him and pulled him into a bone crushing hug. There was long hair sticking to Steve’s scruff on his cheeks, the sound and smell of the leather not drowning out Bucky’s harsh breaths or his own smell; a bit musky and salty from the exhaustion of the day. Steve, though, needed a moment to catch up and when he did and wrapped his arms around Bucky, he could hear his own sob swallowed by this all too familiar shoulder. It was hard to tell how long the hug lasted, hands patting him down as if to make sure he was in one piece, before Bucky pulled back just to press their lips together.

 

A strong hand cupped Steve’s face and while this was straight out of his wildest dreams, he couldn’t respond. This seemed too unreal, for him to find Bucky, the one he presumed dead, after ten years of traveling the world just to find him right back where he had left him. His fingers dug into the strong shoulders, trying to see if what he was experiencing was real and only caught up on being kissed when Bucky pulled back. 

 

Burning eyes looked at him and Steve still clung to what he considered to be a ghost. “Was what you just said not about me? Tell me now, Steve, because so help me if there is someone else who calls you punk and takes you dancing although you never wanted to.”

 

“There was never anyone else.” Steve felt offended to be asked such a question and at the same time he was still too surprised by who was speaking to him in the first place.

 

“So you still love me?” Each word was tinted with an unknown emotion, making Steve wonder and all he could do was answer with what he knew was the truth.

 

“To the end of the line.” 

 

With a forceful push, he stumbled back into the confessional and sat down with a heavy thump, looking up at Bucky with awe and wonder. Even more so when he came closer and straddled his thighs. The fit was anything but comfortable, but when Bucky leaned in to kiss him again, he realized how little he cared. This time all he care about was kissing back. His hands were firmly planted on Bucky’s back again, splayed out over every bit of skin he could reach. 

 

He had always wondered what it would be like to kiss Bucky and now that they did, there was none of the hesitation he expected to be there. He licked into his mouth, tongue sliding against Bucky’s before pulling back and nipping on the bottom lip. Tasting him was nearly too much, only being topped by the feeling of Bucky grinding down on him. Their mouths were filled with each other’s groans and moans, neither of them caring how easily they could have been spotted if someone would step further into the ruins. As far as Steve was concerned, all he cared about was having his best guy back. And he most certainly planned on making the most out of it.

 

Apparently this was also on Bucky’s mind because his hands were everywhere, tugging on Steve’s old tactical vest and the worn down shirt underneath, only pulling away from his lips to get rid of it. Steve helped all too happily, raising his arms over his head and letting the cool air kiss his skin where Bucky had ignited it with his touch. He was so desperate for every bit of contact, afraid he would wake up any given second just to be all alone again, his hands wanted to make short work of everything separating their bodies from touching. Slipping his hands under the skirt, smirking as he found the slit on the side and pushing the fabric out of the way, he released an obscene sound upon realizing there was actually no other item covering Bucky. His hands were cupping that firm ass he had lusted after for far too long, digging his fingers into the flesh and pulling him in impossibly close.

 

Bucky’s reaction was one Steve would memorize forever, the moan pouring into Steve’s mouth and how he pushed into the touch all he needed to know being this was what they both wanted. As if Bucky had read his mind, he asked from the corner of his mouth, “Please tell me there is something in that bag we can use.”

 

It took Steve’s love filled mind a second to catch up with these words and when he pulled back and looked down at the bag, he mentally went through its contents. For a short, scary moment, Steve seriously wondered if they were about to get cockblocked after such a long time by the lack of anything they could use as lubricant when he remembered the little tin of coconut oil he had got as a thank you for his help. When he moved, he felt Bucky wrapping an arm around his neck, clinging to him while he kissed and nipped along his scruffy jawline and down his neck over his pulse. His whole body was tingling and he felt like burning up, even more so when Bucky once again grinded down on him and was rubbing his hard cock over his still fabric covered bulge. And all that while he tried to reach his bag. But apparently Bucky still loved to be a little shit and he felt him smiling against his skin as he bent down to one side to reach for his it. 

 

Another moment later and he got what he was looking for, holding it up for Bucky to see. He still had a hard time catching up with what was happening, still wondering if he would wake up any minute from a fever dream. But if that was the case, he hoped for this to continue for just a bit longer. Because Bucky felt so real in his arms and against his body, he could feel him breathing and moving, each muscle shifting under his touch and Steve prayed to Mother Earth himself not to take this away from him again. 

 

“This will definitely work,” Bucky murmured into his ear and took the little tin from his hand just to go back to kissing down his neck and to his collarbone and Steve felt the light scratch of stubble against his skin as he wandered further down to his nipple. Nothing in his wildest dreams could have prepared him for what Bucky had in store for him. His head hit the back of the confessional with a loud thud, completely gone in the moment with Bucky sucking and licking over his hard bud. His own hands got acquainted with his body, slipping from the curve of his ass down the back of his thigh, even pushing the fabric aside to reveal his hard cock. And Bucky didn’t seem in the least fazed by it, eyes flicking up to his face and Steve could hear his question without Bucky using any words. At least there was one way to get rid of that smug expression and when he wrapped his hand around that thick cock, pulling the skin over the head once and earning a shuddering moan in return, he knew they were even. At least as even as two people burning up for each other could get. 

 

But Steve should have known Bucky was not a person who liked to give the reins out of his hand. He couldn’t say where the tin went, but he most definitely felt two hands on his belt and button and a moment later an eager hand in his pants, pulling his cock out. A slap on his hand, still around Bucky’s cock, to make him let go and a swift movement was all it took for Steve to turn into a panting, hot mess, clinging to his back as he pressed against him. Bucky grinded down against him, their cocks lining up perfectly against each other. Everything was so rushed and yet so perfect and still Steve wanted to do so much more. He wanted to taste him more intimately, wanted to watch him while he made him come with his hand, wanted to explore his body with his mouth.

 

“Stevie,” Bucky groaned against his lips before licking into his mouth just to grind down even harder, and Steve wasn’t sure if Bucky really said those next words or not, but he could have sworn he’d heard him say, “We have all the time in the world.” 

 

And Bucky was right. This was only the beginning. There was movement once again, Bucky reaching for something behind Steve and he could smell the scent of coconut a moment later. Still kissing, Steve gave himself over to Bucky, trusting him completely with everything that was coming. When he felt his hand around his cock, he thrusted up into Bucky’s hand and pulled him down for another searing kiss as he lubed him up with the coconut oil. And as blissful as this moment was, it didn’t last long before Bucky moved once again. Steve’s eyes followed his movement and he watched him pouring a bit more oil into his palm and when he looked up into Bucky’s face, getting a wink in return, he bit his lip as he realized he was about to prep himself. He felt him reach under the skirt as he lifted his ass from his thighs and as much as he wanted to help him, watching his face contort from slight displeasure to lust was nearly just as good. That plus the slick sound drove him only closer to despair. 

 

“Buck.” Steve was surprised to hear his own voice sound so pleading when he leaned his forehead against Bucky’s chest, feeling him move and shift and hearing him pant. It nearly felt as if he was begging, and Bucky had pity with him.

 

The seat of the confessional didn’t give them a lot of room to move, but it was enough for Bucky to get on his knees and line Steve’s cock up with his hole before he slowly lowered himself again. 

 

Watching Bucky do that, Steve’s hands planted on his hips, was already nearly enough for him. The expression of pure bliss and pleasure the lower he sank down, every now and then slipping up a bit again to adjust the angle, his eyelids fluttering and lips parted, sent sparks through Steve’s body. He brought a hand up to Bucky’s face, cupping his cheek and feeling the roughness of his stubble against his calloused palm before slipping two fingers into his mouth. Immediately, Bucky wrapped his lips around the digits, sucking on them and twirling his tongue around the pads and Steve had to pull his hand back or he would be gone in a second. 

 

Instead, the second Bucky was completely settled down, he wrapped his arms around his waist and kissed his sternum and chest, nuzzling against the soft hair he found there and just enjoying the intimate connection between them. If it was for Steve, they could have stayed like this forever, but once again Bucky had different things in mind. With his familiar strength, he pried Steve’s arms from his body and pinned them against the wall above Steve before he started moving. Not the grinding Steve already got introduced to. No. Bucky moved hard and fast, thrusting down on Steve’s cock over and over, groaning and grunting with each thrust, accompanied by the moans he elicited from Steve in return. And Steve wanted to fight Bucky so badly, he wanted to reach between them and wrap his hand back around Bucky’s cock which now slapped against his stomach with each downward thrust, leaving wet patches on his skin. 

 

The way Bucky was riding him, how he just took what he needed, showed Steve how much he had been missing Steve as well and it was all he needed. He let Bucky have this, completely following him into the pleasure this was giving them both, every muscle tensing and little knots in his chest and groin drawn tighter to the point he thought he couldn’t take it anymore. And then he felt Bucky come, slamming down with one last slapping sound onto his thighs, clenching around his cock and then there was so much: Bucky’s come on his skin, his own climax overwhelming him, jerking his hips up again and again as he rode his pleasure out and then there were Bucky’s lips on his own and Steve was free to move again. 

 

Steve couldn’t say for how long they stayed in the confessional after their bodies calmed down again, kissing and holding each other, but by the time they stepped out it was dark. Bucky took him to the rectory that belonged to the church where they showered and went to bed together. It was there Bucky told him how he survived, how everyone presumed him dead and this was what actually saved his life. People helped him to get better and he was bedridden for a long while and it took him even longer until he remembered Steve, which was why he never went out and looked for him. There were fragments and pictures popping up in his mind, but never enough to form a full picture. Only a year ago, he met some old friends who recognized him and by talking to them his memories came back. Hearing Bucky tell him what he’d gone through, Steve wanted to hate himself so much more for not looking for him sooner. But Bucky took these worries from him and they made love again. Over and over until neither of them had any regrets anymore. 

 

This was how word got around about the preacher and his husband, who went out to help people where he could, who spoke together to other people about love and that sometimes you needed to wait for things to fall into place. 

 

-END-

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos/Comments are love and it's what Cap actually would do!


End file.
